Getting In & Staying On & Getting Out of a Hammock
First visually inspect and then TEST! the set up (new or used) prior to committing your total mass and inertia. It’s your only body; be kind to it and be careful with it.
Laying down on a hammock uses the same criteria as getting into a small boat: balance and weight distribution .Refine your mount so you always end up in the center of the web. A list in a hammock is like a boat with a list (leaning over to one side). It shows a lack of operational refinement and is just not as comfortable.
1. Back up to the hammock, ‘til the web panel touches your butt. If the hammock is set up correct height the rim line will cross your ass in the middle, this is the right distance off the ground for the best mount/dismount.
2. Grasp the side of the hammock (rim line) and slide it under your derriere as you sit down.
3. From the sitting position swing your legs up and on to the web panel at the same time as you lay down! (This is one (1) smooooth/fluid motion.) Utilize your sense of balance as you distribute your mASS.
NOTE!
The one thing you can do to assure making a total spectacle of yourself as you do a major face plant is to sit straight up in a hammock with your legs extended. This completely changes the center of gravity and stability is GREATLY! reduced and you WILL very quickly tip over and you WILL immediately scratch up your face, elbows, teeth and tits if you are unaware of this particular-peculiar Totally Hammock dynamic. With a little practice and training you can avoid this amateur stunt, known as the “Full Gilligan” I guess I could have put this in a more delicate manner but hey, NOW you Know. And that is no bullshit.
4.Laying on the web panel slightly diagonal will flatten the hammock bed(a little trick of ours).
5. To “roust” thyself ring for full reverse and undo the reclining.FIRST!!! swing your legs over till they touch the ground.#2-THEN!sit up
It’s sooooo eeeeeeeeZ, just do it…..
Most people have a short concise Learning curve to attain a smooth entry and exit. Flamboyance is NOT a requirement. A few users choose to rehearse solo, off camera, with a helmet, elbow and knee pads plus a mouth guard. Personally I don’t think it’s that tough to pull off the old hammock in out with a reasonable degree/level of elan. Note: the more people in a hammock at the same time the more chance of accidents. You are the judge, make good decisions and have fun not problems.
REMEMBER: small children will often “go wild” and become reckless and impetuous when left to their own minimal restraints. YOU, the owner, should always be in attendance because you, the owner, are liable if a child should attain orbital velocity and experience an inflight operational error precipitating a crash landing or burning up on reentry. End of Legal Disclosure.#001